Look at me don't post for ages then twice in one day.....
Back in September i posted this post
my youngest split up with her long time boyfriend,to say i was pleased was an understatement.
She continued to see the man she met on holiday until last week when she decided she wanted to get back with her ex.Saturday she informed me they were going out for dinner,she then text me to ask if he could come in after her very quick meal. I was polite for the short duration i saw him but it was so hard.I really don't like the lad,hes not a bad lad but i know he isn't good for my daughter.
I know i was probably wrong but a few things had to be said of how i was going to be with him.During the whole of there previous relationship if we went out.away or did anything,he never paid for anything.My daughter is my responsibility but hes not an i was beginning to recent the fact he never got anyone a drink or offered petrol money or went halves on anything.My daughter would offer me money but i wouldnt take her money,If they are to be back together i had to say this.My daughter was very upset about me saying this.
At this very moment in time i don't know how i will be able to be anything but polite to him because this far into them being back together i see no difference in the relationship,he still wants to sit indoors,I'm still picking her up .
I love my daughter and it is hurting me and i know i should be different but i don't know how to be...
She is right when she says i should be happy for her but do i know too much about their previous relationship to forgive and forget.
You will always be her soft place to land, you are just trying to get her to accept she doesn't have to be a pushover to this lad. Why does it seem that it was so much easier when they were teeny newborns?? FMx
ReplyDeleteit never gets any easier does it.
DeleteIt's always hard to watch someone you love being treated unfairly even though they don't think so. I'm with you, I would speak my mind too, and have done in the past. I'd rather that, than have to tread on eggshells every time you see him. At the end of the day you will always be there for her, and she will know that.
ReplyDeletePatricia x
OK two issues, first the easy one, I would have rescued the jumper and often trade magazines with friends, with no shame. Its silly to just throw them away when they are of use to you.
ReplyDelete2nd issue - by far the hardest. I think you were right to raise your concerns with your DD. Luckily I have never really had to deal with this with my DD but I can well understand how hard it must be. My DM had to deal with similar issues with both me and my oldest DSis and it made life hard for all of us. Eventually, not without much grief, I left my NotsoDXH, much to my DMs relief but as he is the NotsoDF of my DS, she still mentions her what eventually turned into hatred for him.
All you can do is be true to yourself, let your DD know that whilst you accept that he is her choice, you are her DM and want the best for her.
Granny x